Introduction & First Impressions

Winter is cold. It makes everything it touches cold. It makes my hands cold, my nose cold, me feet cold. Heck, I’m even sporting a dickcicle between my legs as we speak. Hats, gloves, and socks can solve my first three problems, but what is a person to do about a cold penis? Buy it a sweater? Wrap it in a blanket? Nuke it in the microwave?

Before anyone tries to put their junk in the science oven, let me first introduce you to the Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration! The key word there being HEAT! And heat is how you combat the winter blues (or just enjoy a luxurious night to yourself regardless of the weather).

The Satisfyer Heat and Vibration is part of Satisfyer’s fairly recent attempt (as in the last couple of years) at breaking into the penis toy market. Before this they were solely focused on their line of clitoral sucking devices. But they have begun to branch out, now offering vibrators and a number of “Satisfyer Men” products (but FYI, I feel I should point out that you do not need to be a man to use them, just a human who wishes to use those products).

How It Works

The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration is similar to other masturbation cups. It is a plastic shell with a hole for me to stick my penis through. But rather than stimulating the whole shaft (like a Fleshlight), the Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration focuses mainly on the stimulation of the penis head. Making the Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration a shorter, squat looking toy.  Also, as the name implies, this masturbator vibrates and has the has the optional (but winter necessary) heating function.

If vibration is your jam (and it’s not normally mine) the Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration has 7 levels of vibration, all of them at constant speeds in increasing intensity, no patterns. The vibration is controlled via a control panel on the face of the masturbator. There are four buttons, the on/off button which predictably turns the toy on and then off again and unpredictably it also changes the vibration pattern being used. There is also the +/- buttons which will control the speed of the vibrations. Last but not least is the temperature control button. Its all reasonably easy to figure out.

In my opinion, the heat option is real star here. The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration has three heat levels, with the highest being 104 degrees Fahrenheit. It runs just a tad higher than normal body temperature, nothing that will roast your weenie. To use the heat function your first press the button that looks like a thermometer. This button will start flashing red, don’t worry, nothing’s wrong, the toy is just heating up. Once the blinking red light turns into a solid red light it means that the toy has reached the desired temperature. When you are finished using the toy be sure to turn the temperature back off again. As far as I can tell there is no fail safe that turns it off after a certain period of time. It will just continue to heat until you tell it to stop. I do take issue with how the heat function is controlled as there is no real discernible way to tell which heat setting you are currently on. There is no light to show lowest level, mid level, or high level. You just click the button and let God sort it out.

Size, Shape, & Materials

Dimensions:
Total length: 5.5 inches.
Penetrable length: 3 inches.
Width: 3 inches

As I said earlier, it is a rather short and squat toy. Very reminiscent of a large coffee mug. Like, one of those heavy duty thermal travel mugs. It looks less like something I should put my penis into and more like something I should be handing over to the barista to pour my morning brew in to.

Though, I can’t deny that there is a certain air of modern sleekness to it. There is also something refreshing about owning a masturbator that does not stare me in the face with its hungry human holes, a disembodied mouth or a rogue asshole. The Satsifyer Men Heat and Vibration possesses no human qualities, only those of a poorly designed coffee much (the base is not flat, you’ll spill your coffee the moment you set it down).

The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration is made up of a ABS plastic shell which surrounds a silicone sleeve. I am told that I should avoid silicone lube with this toy, as silicone has the potential to act poorly with other silicone products. I had no idea and never experienced this, but it was told to me by people far smarter than I am.

If you are the sort who likes to get their masturbation done in the bath or shower, because hot water is far superior to standing around in the cold winter air, fear not! The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration is rated as being waterproof ipx7, which means that it can be submerged in up to 1 meter of water for 30 minutes.

In Use

I’ve used vibrating toys before. Vibration is nothing new to me, but heat? Heat is something new, something interesting, something actually quite exciting! I’m not sure that it enhanced my pleasure levels, but it sure did enhance the comfort and luxuriousness of the whole experience. I can’t imagine wanting to ever use an unheated toy again!

Using this toy was took a slight adjustment to my personal mind set. I am really more of a whole penis sort of person. If I am masturbating, I go all in, head, shaft, balls, everyone gets involved. But the Satsifyer Men Heat and Vibration is very much a head only sort of experience. The penetrable depth of this is quite shallow, it was enough room for my penis head and just the smallest bit of the shaft, the rest of me was left out in the cold (literally, because you know… it’s heated). This isn’t a bad thing, it just took me a little bit of getting used to, but once I accepted that this was an invitation only party and only my penis head was invited, things went great.

The vibrations weren’t bad. Because my whole head was feeling the vibrations it wasn’t quite as shocking to my system as having a vibrator pushed into just a single spot (I don’t usually like that). I would describe the vibrations as being fairly mid-range as far as speed/intensity and more on the buzzy side of the spectrum. I kept the intensity pretty low, I enjoyed it at a low hum, something that felt more like background noise, rather then the main feature. Then I just laid back and enjoyed the warm heat and some light, shallow stroking.

It was a bit of a tight squeeze for me, I’ve been told my penis is girthier than the average penis, so it did require ample lube to ease myself in. Though I did end up enjoying the tighter fit.

Care & Maintenance

Because this toy is waterproof washing it is pretty easy. You don’t have to be too fiddly about it, the whole thing can be dunked under water and run under the tap to flush it out. I use just the smallest dollop of soap and give it a good scrub with my fingers then turn it upside down on a towel to drip dry for a bit. As with most toys, I recommend letting it dry completely before you store it away.

There isn’t a whole lot of maintenance that needs to be preformed, other than charging it up every so often. The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration comes with its own USB magnetic charging cable which you can plug it into your computer and borrow your phone’s wall charging adapter. I don’t know exactly how long it takes to charge, I always forget about it when I am charging it and by the time I remember its fully charged. I’m guessing an our or so? It does retain its charge for quite some time though. I get multiple play sessions per charge.

If something does go wildly wrong it does come with a 10 year manufacturer warranty.

Recommendation

Overall, it was a pretty solid masturbator, so I do feel pretty comfortable recommending it. I think the construction of the toy is well thought out for the most part (there are a few tweaks I would like to see made though) and the material quality is definitely good.

I would really like to see the button system revamped. The buttons on the control panel are not raised in anyway, so it near impossible to navigate by touch alone. Because I was unable to feel the location of the buttons I ended up gripping the toy poorly and turning the toy off  or changing my vibration settings in the heat of the moment, it got frustrating.

Another issue is with knowing what temperature I set the heat at. I just couldn’t find any discernible way to tell what temperature I was on. Am I missing something or is it really just a guessing game?

The heat was excellent though. This masturbator is worth it just for the heat function alone. Perfect toy for those of us living in cold climates. Or for anyone who just likes things a little bit more luxurious.

Purchase Your Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration From SheVibe Or Betty’s Toy Box!

TLDR

The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration is a non human orifice based masturbation sleeve from Satisfyer’s newish range of  penis toys. It is a smaller masturbator, concentrating its efforts mostly on the head and upper shaft of the penis (though this will depend on the actual size the penis you are working with). It features vibrations, which I thought were pretty mid-range in intensity and a little on the buzzy side and heat. The heat function of the toy is the by far the best part of the whole thing. With three temperature settings you can experience anything from cozy warm to mid-grade fever temps. I thought masturbating with the Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration was at least 98% more luxurious using the heat function. Overall a pretty good toy and something I can recommend.

The Satisfyer Men Heat and Vibration is part of Hardwood Reviews personal toy collection. Tested and given an honest review.

Author: Hardwood Reviews

Just your friendly internet log here!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *